| (no subject) |
[Apr. 23rd, 2009|11:24 pm] |
I haven't written at all lately, because recently my thoughts tend to be rather frantic and circular, like a rodent's. Here's a sample:
Broken toe - friggin' cat. What shoes do I wear to the Barrister's Ball with broken toe? Have to be flats - ew gross haven't found dress yet - want formal cheap stunning Have lost 12 lbs but not enough - am still *round*. Protein leafy green vegetables quinoa Gillian McKeith BBC "Cash in the Attic" love antiques bone china from England yay. Can't drink too much the night of the Ball - alcohol fattening, plus gotta write paper gotta outline gotta study study read cases study. law school - outline crim pro family law Infiniti broken - what the hell? Hope it's not more than $500 to fix okay, more than $700 money shit what about money? No jobs - stupid economy. Starbucks? No; hate working face to face with the public. Have to be an unpaid intern - ask Evil Grandmother to give me the rest of my inheritance so I don't starve. Hate begging. Head hurts toe hurts back hurts fuck. How can I get to exams without a car? Who's throwing up now? Baby Bunny cat - crap. Cats getting old *I'M* getting old - I'll be 30 in a week holy shit it's late April. Spring? Forgot about spring wanna go outside what's that? Haven't seen the sun in months except in slideshow at environmental law climate change lecture may *never* see the sun until law school ends. law school - outline pro res, copyright paper But if I'm an unpaid intern this summer I may be working all the time anyway, and I'll never see the sun never sleep why can't I sleep? Gotta read exam-prep book in one day, but that'll keep me awake. o god exams paper scared about grades job money car Need drugs to sleep. Why does Tod snore? I'll bet I don't snore. Keep foot elevated man this sucks Broken toe - friggin' cat. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 27th, 2009|06:34 pm] |
This has totally always been one of my big dreams, and some lucky mofo actually got to do it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VswBKrPuAQ
My other current dream is to fake my own death (so I don't have to pay off my student loans) and move to England and plant hedgerows. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 7th, 2008|03:48 am] |
I got rear-ended the other day, with resultant whiplash and destruction to my poor Hippiemobile (the trunk got stove in, and the rear driver's side door no longer opens). It's my first accident (there really should be a "My First Accident" children's toy that teaches young'uns what to expect). Luckily, the dumbass that hit me had full insurance, so I'll get a rental car until they either fix it or consider it totaled and buy me a new one.
I've had a couple of pretty hairy nightmares since then, where I experience the crash and the *CRUNCH* all over and wake up thinking, "Goddammit, it happened AGAIN!" And I've had headaches every day since it happened, although they WERE getting better...
I'm going to drink myself to sleep now, which is just about as healthy as it sounds. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 30th, 2008|10:16 pm] |
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Am designing own couture wedding gown, a la "Runway." Anybody got a spare dressmaker's dummy? |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 29th, 2008|09:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pensive | ] |
I'm re-reading Crazy Uncle Steve's Apt Pupil, the single scariest, most repellent work of fiction I've ever read. I'm on kind of a "facing my fears" kick lately, now that my biggest one (the usual biggie - real, lasting loneliness) seems to be moot.
I guess I try to read the things that scared me when I was younger because with sufficient familiarity, they'll lose their oomph. We all do that, right? Purge the poison, etc. And (aside from the above) nothing that's real and concrete ever scared me much - usually just fiction. (Like the Loch Ness Monster - is anyone else freaked out by a million-year-old sea monster?)
But Nazis - they were real, and utterly terrifying. I watched "Cabaret" in a semi-fetal position; that scene in the beer garden made me feel physically sick. The idea of rejecting one's humanity to become part of a hive mind, and (as many did) enjoying what you do, is to me the worst thing anyone can do. (The second worst is torturing the helpless, such as animals - also check. Way to cover all the bases, Steve.)
I suppose I'll always deliberately read stuff that terrifies me. I hope the process makes me braver, as it's supposed to, and not just stupider. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 19th, 2008|08:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  giggly | ] |
| [ | ambiance |
| | The Growler - "An Excursion to Grenada" | ] |
I have been walking around singing for days. Am such a sap.
And how fecking cool is it that he's taking my name too?
*happy sigh* |
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| An announcement: |
[Nov. 17th, 2008|07:05 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  enthralled | ] |
Dear everyone:
I just wanted to let you know that Tod and I are getting married in about a week (if all goes according to plan)! Please do NOT send gifts if you were thinking about it, as we are not actually having the fun family-and-friends ceremony yet, just the legal stuff. Invitations will be issued to all in a few years when we actually have the financial wherewithal to have a wedding and honeymoon!
Thank you all for your love, good wishes, and support!!! And please pass the news on to friends whose e-mail I no longer seem to have!
Love, love, LOVE,
Nicole C_____ (soon to be "C_____-G___"!)
AND
Richard Tod G___ (soon ALSO to be "C_____-G___"!)
P.S. - And no, I am not pregnant. ;-D |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 5th, 2008|01:14 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | jubilant | ] |
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| Another effing survey...got it from Becks. |
[Oct. 3rd, 2008|01:06 pm] |
You're trapped in a room for 3 days with your ex: what do you do?
Laugh scornfully and pity him for being such a massive loser.
Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes?
Yes.
Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
Of course!
Are you going anywhere next summer?
NM, to introduce Bubba to my Evil Grandmother - THAT'll be fun. Except for not.
Do you give out second chances easily?
No.
One thing you're looking forward to?
Gettin' hitched.
How do you feel about change?
Ambivalent.
Have you ever cried from being so mad?
That's generally why I DO cry.
Do you prefer to be around people, or by yourself?
Depends.
Are your ears gauged?
Huh?
Is the last person you kissed mad at you?
I sure as hell hope not.
What jewelry do you wear all the time?
My crescent moon necklace, my engagement ring, and my toe ring.
How's your heart today?
Slight arrhythmia.
Are you in a good mood?
Sure.
Is any part of your body sore?
Always.
Are you mean?
Generally.
Do you care if people hate you for no reason?
Sometimes.
Dark hair or light hair in the opposite sex?
Dark.
Do you miss anyone right now?
Sure.
Name someone that made you laugh today?
Godfrey.
Do you prefer to call or text?
Text.
Where is your biological father at?
Probably at UNH.
Do you tell your mom everything?
Almost.
How did you and your number 1 become friends?
My number 1 what? Number 1 friend? Number 1 squeeze?
Have you told anybody you loved them today?
Yep.
How did you wake up this morning?
Morning sounds - slamming doors, meowing cats, etc.
Where were you at 11:45 last night?
Passed out due to the Sarah Palin drinking game.
If you could go back in time and change something, would you?
Probably, but then my life would be different, and that would suck.
What made you cry last?
PMS.
How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
Seldom.
If there was a spider in your room, would you leave?
No, I'd put it safely outside.
Do you miss the way things used to be?
Occasionally.
Does it bother you when someone lies to you?
Obv.
Have you ever told someone you love them?
Okay, this thing is clearly written for 13-year-olds.
Does the last person you kissed have any importance in your life?
Woah Nellie, yeah!
How old was the last person you kissed?
30.
What would I find if I looked under your bed?
Cat hair, ear plugs, and my missing moonstones.
Who was that last person with whom you had a phone call longer than 15 minutes?
Probably my dad - he never stops talking.
Do you believe that you can change for someone?
Possibly.
If your ex REALLY needed you at 3 am, would you go to his/her house.
Oh, HELL no.
Do you miss the person you fell the hardest for?
I see him every day.
Could you go a day without eating?
NEVER.
When was the last time you talked to your number 2 in person?
WTF is my # 2?
Has anyone ever told you they're in love with you?
Obv.
When was the last time you were disappointed?
Probably last week - really can't remember.
Are you playing hard to get right now?
No need.
Do you miss your past?
Bits of it.
Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
Of course!
Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now?
Sure - absent friends, mostly.
Do you believe exes can be friends?
Sometimes, but it's generally not a good idea. (Mary, I am talking to you!)
Have you fixed friendships with anyone lately?
Not recently.
Do you believe everything you hear?
No.
Look outside: how's the weather?
Trying for sun.
What's one of your favorite colors?
Blue.
In the past week have you felt stupid?
Yes.
Who would you do anything for?
Tod.
Is there someone that you will never stop loving?
Me mum.
Whats the age difference between you and the last person you kissed?
2 years.
Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
Because he is loverly.
Have you ever worn the opposite sex's underwear?
Only boxers.
Have you ever been outside completely naked?
Yes; today!
Do you believe your ex thinks about you?
If he has a brain in his head, yes.
What do you currently hear right now?
Birds.
How has the week been?
Pretty standard.
Would you take a bullet for anyone?
Yes.
What time is it now?
Who gives a shit?
Has anyone told you that they would always be there for you?
Yes.
Would you ever get a tattoo?
Perchance.
What's irritating you right now?
My own laziness.
Are you stubborn?
YES.
Who else is in the room with you?
Various kittens.
What will you be doing in a half hour?
Going to the library and getting groceries - woot!
What kind of bottoms are you wearing?
Sleep bottoms.
Are you sarcastic?
Duh...
Are you talkative?
Yes.
Do you fall for people easily?
Not really.
Can you live a day without TV?
Yes.
What is wrong with you right now?
Nothing that can't be remedied by lipo and some tater tots... |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 11th, 2008|02:28 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | ambiance |
| | Ben Taylor - "Nothing I Can Do" | ] |
I always love the avant garde episodes of "Runway" the best:
I'm placing my bets on either Joe or Korto to win (probably the latter).
Insomnia for the 3rd night in a row, and it's starting to piss me off. Part of it is my back; now even when I HAVEN'T been doing exercise, it aches. Fabulous.
Am finally rid of bloody trainee; being shackled to her for 10 hours a day was making migraines much worse. She is mentally the slowest person I have ever met; she uses the word "humdinger" a lot; she never shuts up about her tyrant of a mother in Minne-SO-ta; and did not know who the president was until I told her. In fact, she does not believe a woman should BE president. Needless to say, none of these qualities endeared her to me.
Christ, I want to sleep.
Everyone who loves James Taylor needs to run right out and buy his son Ben's "Another Run Around The Sun." It's aptly named; it is a beautiful album and already I love it dearly.
Bubba and cats and mum all very wonderful. Those three parts of my family are all that keeps me going on the bad days. On the good days, I am so glad to not be hurting that I am invariably in a great mood.
I just realized it's September 11th. Yep. Time for Ghouliani to break out his hair shirt and constant refrain - his "Freebird," to quote Jon Stewart. Time for the rest of us to be pissed off and sad and remember what we were doing that morning (and the PWM and Logan connection, if you're in our neck of the Maine woods).
Reread this entire post and it's totally disjointed; O well. Time to take more drugs and hope that I have pleasantly pharmaceutitastic dreams. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 9th, 2008|01:11 am] |
Am heartily sick of following names:
* Wasila
* Palin
* Bristol
* Track
* Trig
Christ, that woman's an idiot. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 10th, 2008|07:22 pm] |
Fuck John Edwards. Seriously. If he lived around here I'd go castrate him, and that may or may not be the steroids talking. |
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| Kill me. |
[Aug. 7th, 2008|04:26 pm] |
Today may be a new low for me.
I've been chronically sleep-deprived, but too jittery to sleep, because the drugs are keeping me up. Even wine doesn't help, really, so I'm mising a bit of work when I'm to exhausted to go in.
I've gained about a pound a day since I've been on the Prednisone, so none of my goddamn clothes fit (they were admittedly a bit snug to begin with). So now I have about 10 extra lbs to lose. And to add to the bloat, I have my period. FAB. And the steroids haven't turned out to be such a goddamn boon anyway, because once again I'm in pain every day.
I'm frequently angry and depressed for no reason (except chemical ones) - I actually chased a guy on the highway today after he followed me too closely and I was going a perfectly reasonable 70 MPH. But, in all fairness to me, he was a Masshole in a Mercedes, so he probably deserved a but of a scare anyway.
My car battery just died. I'm going to miss the booze cruise.
Please let tomorrow be better? |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 5th, 2008|12:27 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | drunkish | ] |
I'm pretty tipsy, because lately I seem to require at least one glass of wine and several melatonin to counteract the wakey-wakey effects of the steroids, so I may well not make any sense. So feel free to ignore.
I am LOVING the steroids - I've barely had a head twinge in the 3 days since I've been on them. Wish I could be all the time, but I understand they make your testicles shrink, so NO THANKS to that!!!
T. and I have been taking advantage of my little head vacation by doing fun stuff - we went to dinner at Bugaboo tonight, and the day before we (okay, HE) made a lovely dinner at home. He also bought me Erica's purse, the YakPak one with the hedgehogs and toadstools, which I've been coveting lo these many months. So I am sorry, Erica Shmerica, for being derivative and copycattish, but I truly do love it and have named 2 of the hedgehogs thus far (George and Pantoufle. I do not know why).
Here are some pictures of my so-wonderful new purse:
The close-up (but imagine mine without all those jive-ass buttons.)
That is all, I think. And if it isn't, who gives a shit?
So neener. |
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| Stupidhead: |
[Aug. 2nd, 2008|10:09 pm] |
I haven't written this summer at all, partly because at first I was having too much fun to write, and lately because I haven't been having any fun at all. I've been getting sicker by the day; my migraines and tension headaches have escalated to one or more a day; they're generally severe and last for several hours each, and they leave me exhausted and depressed.
At my recent kaffeklatch with my wonderful neurologist, I mentioned that I was living in fear that, at the rate things were going, I wouldn't be better by early September, and the upshot of the conversation was that I decided to take a semester off from school. I'm not even going to take one class, because I need to concentrate all of my efforts on getting healthy.
Currently, the health regimen consists of Frova, Propranolol, diet, excercise, and steroids. Yes, steroids. The doctor told me to warn my closest loved ones that I could experience aggressiveness, backne, depression, death, and/or bloody stools. I don't THINK I'm any more aggressive, but I've been amusing myself at work by yelling epithets once some particularly provoking caller has hung up (ex: "I will SNAP your NECK!!!") and then glancing around at the others and perkily saying, "Oops - steroids!" It's a peck of fun. I imagine mild Tourette's patients operate very much the same way when they're bored.
So for the nonce I'm going to work full-time, and when I'm not hurting, play badminton and go out with Tod and hang out with my friends again and go to parties (but only the good ones) and do some charity work (soup kitchen or animal shelter; I haven't decided which). I will also be tested within an inch of my puffy-from-Prednisone hide by the docs. The last resorts are Botox, lobotomy, and pain clinics, but I've got almost 5 months to play with, and I'm hoping I can find a preventative that works before then.
So please wish me luck, and I'll hopefully be re-entering the world again in the next month or so. I'll try to keep y'all posted, assuming you give a good goddamn.
xxxooo,
Me |
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| In Which I Write A Music Review: |
[Jun. 17th, 2008|11:29 pm] |
"Circus Money," by Walter Becker:
Becker's long-awaited second solo album is reminiscent of the Sunday New York Times: it's very busy and there's something there for almost everyone.
For die-hard fans, there are glimpses of Becker's musical past with Steely Dan and his first solo album, "11 Tracks of Whack." Observant types will catch a whiff of "Aja" in one song, and certain Becker-esque phrasing from "Whack" in another. Becker's careless, raspy drawl is laced with the crooning of a smooth-as-silk backup trio, which includes the lovely Carolyn Leonhart-that-was (of recent Steely Dan projects). And there's profanity - oh my, yes! It wouldn't be Walter without a little bit of dirty.
There's a strong reggae theme to the album, interspersed with some (what else?) creepy circus-style music. The songs segue from Becker's signature observational whimsy ("Circus Money"; "Selfish Gene") to wistful, wry tales of love gone sour ("Paging Audrey"; "Downtown Canon") to thinly-veiled love songs to New York City ("Darkling Down"†).
"Circus Money" is much edgier, more avant garde than "Whack," and the tunes are far less easy to sing along with. There are myriad unexpected key changes and noodling sax solos. However, it grows on you each time you hear it, and everytime I pop it in the CD player I hear an unexpected gem of a lyric or a captivating hook that I missed before. "Circus Money" will continue to intrigue and amuse with each re-playing.
Grade: B (and climbing)
† And don't tell me that "Darkling Down" isn't about NY just because it refers to Inglewood. C.f. WB once admitting that "The Boston Rag" was actually about NYC. There's more than one way to skin a hep cat... |
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| Lookit, lookit!!! |
[May. 27th, 2008|04:56 pm] |
This is the cutest freakin' bus shelter you ever did see! I would totally give up my beloved Hippiemobile (most of the time) if I could wait at one of these:
Here are some more:
Creative Bus Stops |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 27th, 2008|01:27 pm] |
Am luxuriating in freedom, humidity, and Lovecraft right now. I got back from the car repair place hours before I anticipated because they (to quote the adorable old man behind the counter) "double-teamed [me]." HAH! And to make things even kinkier, Tod was on the phone with me almost the entire time. (Although, if I got double-teamed, it seems unfair that I should have to pay THEM...)
So now I'm in my flowy satin nightgown, which is actually a gorgeous afternoon tea gown but I can't wear it as such because it isn't particularly flattering on me - makes me look like a Japanese pillar. But it's still lovely and cool.
For the past few days I've been kicking back and relaxing (and occasionally cleaning in a half-assed sort of way). T's coming home tonight, and the boys seem excited. (At least, they don't seem UN-excited, so who's to say they're not?) And now I start werk on Thurs., according to Campface, who has changed the day on me a couple times. Ah, well...at least I finally know I'm hired.
Thank you, Nikki, for the invite to your wonderful BBQ, and the sake set, and the staff (I'll give you a fiver on Wednesday)! I've told Tod he has a "Gandalf-surprise" waiting for him at home; he seems intrigued.
Saw "Stardust" with M. last night; it's a gorgeous and funny movie (based on the Neil Gaiman novel, if you loved Good Omens, and who didn't?!?). It's rather reminiscent of "The Princess Bride"; you should rent it.
Off to read about Cthulhu and Nylarathotep and Yog-Soggoth and all sorts of wicked beasties from out of space-time; I do like a good Lovecraft in the summertime (winter is just too grim already without him adding to it). I'm reading an annotated version, and we have several interesting similarities; our love of cats and our obnoxious Anglophilia, to name a few. I really have a great affection for the guy, along with "Crazy Uncle Steve" King. This is probably because I am positively morbid.
Ta! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 23rd, 2008|04:51 pm] |
Today's odd, somehow; I was going to go to Liz and Rob's party, but I just don't seem that interested now...plus, I didn't know what the hell to get either of them. So that's probably out unless I get my second wind.
I've also been getting weird omens lately, if omens they are. M. hit a deer and totaled her car (yes, she's fine), so I was going to buy her a new one because I am a good and dutiful daughter. Anyway, she tells me that she's looking at this teal-colored Volvo owned by a woman named...Teal (which gave me a giggle). Then the next day, I saw some lovely dinnerware in...putty. Just kidding, it was also teal. I've also had 3 mentions of the name Selina (with the same spelling, which is unusual) in 2 days. What does this mean? Will Tod leave me for a woman named Selina who wears a lot of teal? Maybe she'll be at the wedding.
T. IS out of town for a wedding in Knoxville. I'd have gone with him, but I just wasn't up for meeting new people so soon after leaving academihell, and I don't have much money anyway (especially after buying a truck for M., which - mercifully! - is NOT teal). I miss him already (he left obscenely early this morning) but I know he'll have fun, spending time with his brother and his aunt and re-visiting all of his old haunts.
I am relieved, however. L______ has stopped dragging its collective corporate feet and has FINALLY consented to hire me for a job for which, after all, I am well-qualified, having worked there for almost 2 bleedin' years. The HOOPS they had me jump through, though!
I leave you now with some random cuteness.
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